Entry 7

Consider this another entry doting on the kindness of complete strangers. Consider this an entry documenting the time that I got a conglomerate of individuals fighting for a cause that may or may not be legitimate. Consider this an entry documenting a time that I felt like a complete fool.
Allow me to preface this by saying that I find issues involving the gay community to be of utmost importance. I feel that a lot of people are sifting through attempt after attempt at putting a label on what we can or cannot look like or who we can or cannot love. The fight for equal rights in this respect is a fight worth fighting for and shame on those who do not feel this way. I feel truly sorry for you.
With that said, a week or two ago I was in a class that two of my fellow hutters, Jennifer and Adam, are also in. There’s an individual that was in our class by the name of Brittany who seemed to be undergoing some hard transitions in her life and through attempts of seeking acceptance she only found herself drowning in the swell of abandonment.
In an attempt to nurture this sense of abandonment, she reached out to members of our class asking for help, a friend, anyone who cared enough to give her the time of day. There were a few who gladly offered their assistance, even if it was only an ear to pay attention, people in the class were more than willing to help.
Then, it seemed, things began getting a little bit repetitive. We would get e-mails from this individual almost every other day updating us on her fragile, unstable state. We’d try to reach out. We’d try to listen, however it seemed that almost any time that anybody tried she made herself more and more unavailable. We felt for her, we really did, but we were running out of ideas. Then, one day, while Brittany was in attendance of the class, things came to unfortunate fruition in the form of an almost overdose in the middle of class.
The following class session held upon us some very frustrating, angering news. We found out that Brittany had tried to seek help from Campus Ministries, a Christian organization held on campus, and was in so many words told she could not seek assistance from them because ‘it’s Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve.’
Instantaneous infuriation beheld the entire class as instant arms were in outreach to Brittany and we were in any way we could at will to help. I, along with Jennifer and Adam, were getting ourselves in order to run this up the flagpole. I quickly contacted members of United Sexualities at IPFW and the Gay Community Center of Fort Wayne asking for assistance and opinions on remedying this ailment on our good conscience. Members of the hut that weren’t even in the class, didn’t even know Brittany, were ready to stand up for her cause.
Soon, though, after making contact with these organizations I received a phone call from another member of our class stating that Brittany’s afflictions were blown up almost like celebrity gossip in yellow journalism. She didn’t want professional help, she kept asking for the help of several classmates but appeared ungrateful on receipt of assistance and friendship. Also, the most unfortunate fact in all of this, was the fact that we no longer knew what was true and what wasn’t.
I contacted again the aforementioned organizations and essentially asked them to attain their own facts regarding the issue for mine had been permanently skewed. I felt so taken advantage of and even worse than that, I felt foolish. I know that gay issues are important, however I felt that Brittany’s carelessness with the gestures of others played to an almost humorous tone on the fragile, important issues at hand.
People felt betrayed, tricked, and overall very unhappy for the fact that we were about to stand up for an issue in honor of Brittany’s trials, trials that at this point could have been false all along. Even worse, people who had not been exposed to adverse lifestyles such as this previously now probably have a skewed look on what some of these people go through and the help that some of them truly need. We were manipulated both in our kindness and advocacy.
My request is simple. There are people out their who need real help and this is not meant to be a statement about how it’s bad to help people, or don’t reach out, or anything like that. This is asking to not let attention seekers ruin your impression of people in different lifestyles. This is an attempt to not take away the importance of these issues, this is just to ask everyone not to respond to cries of ‘wolf.’ Keep an open ear, an open mind, and an open heart but don’t fall victim to falsified notions of need.